


As Soft As She Is

by DandyAceInSpace



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/F, F/M, Rey is a lesbian, bisexual reader
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-13
Updated: 2018-05-13
Packaged: 2019-05-06 01:46:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,494
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14631515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DandyAceInSpace/pseuds/DandyAceInSpace
Summary: When General Organa comes to you for sanctuary, she brings an odd crew with her. Most notable is this girl, Rey. She represents an emotion that you haven't felt in forever; hope.





	As Soft As She Is

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! If you'd like, you can see more content on fullofbees.tumblr.com or visit my Ko-fi at ko-fi.com/fullofbees! More notes at the end of the fic!

“I can’t begin to thank you enough, Queen Y/N,” the woman before you spoke. Her voice was filled with relief but you could tell she was exhausted. Exhausted from running. Exhausted from all of the death that surrounds her.

 

“I promise we will not be staying long. We have an idea of where to set a new base, on-”

 

You stop her sentence with an extended upright palm, “Please, General, I don’t want to hear of your plans. If the First Order were to arrive, Gods help us if I know of your whereabouts. I’m sure you understand.”

 

She nods, a distant look in her eyes and a small smile of remembrance gracing her lips. She takes graceful steps towards your throne, reminiscent of when she once carried the title of princess. You can’t help but notice the limp in her gait, pulling your attention to her age. She was the same brassy woman, no doubt. Her face wasn’t as youthful, yet still beautiful, and she had shortened in stature but she still walked tall. 

 

The guards at your side stood at attention, raising their spears in her direction. She glanced at them before rolling her eyes, annoyed at their ignorance of her personage. Yes, still the same woman.

 

“Stand down,” you command. The guards fall back into place in perfect unison, spears pointed to the ceiling as they rest them on the ground. You stand from your throne, adjusting the skirts of your dress as you make calculated steps towards the woman. 

 

When you meet her, all formalities fade away. It was a front that neither of you could keep for very long. She holds you in a gentle embrace, cradling close as if you were her own. It left a bittersweet sting in your heart. You know that you may have called her mother at one point, but that time is long gone and you both will forever live with his decisions.

 

When you part, you hold her cheeks with your hands, gazing into the familiar brown eyes. “You look fantastic,” you whisper with a smile. She lets out a gentle chuckle. It’s been so long since you’ve heard that laugh, you feel like your dreaming. Like you’re eighteen all over again. “It’s been too long, Leia.”

 

“It has, unfortunately. In between both of our duties, need to catch up. I’m  _ so _ sorry that I wasn’t here to watch you grow,” she says, her hand covering yours.

 

“Don’t be, you were extremely…  _ busy-  _ but I bet you have so many wonderful stories from your adventures,” you muse.

 

“Oh, I do…” she trails off before sighing. She removes your hands from her face and instead holds them sympathetically to her chest. “Y/N, there’s someone I need you to talk to.”

 

You part your lips, tilting your head out of curiosity. “Oh, who is it?”

 

“I think it would be better if she told you herself.”

 

You nod, lips set in a thin line as you ponder the woman that she was mentioning. If it was important that you talk to her, shouldn’t you have some form of an idea of who she was? Secrecy and anonymity, especially with guests, does not sit well with you or your advisors. While many praised your reign, you never knew who had secret motives against your life.

 

“How about over dinner then?” You ask. Dinner is your safest bet. You’ll be surrounded by guards, ready to defend at your command.

 

“There’s no need to be apprehensive, Y/N, but, dinner sounds fantastic.” Damn her. She always had a way to see right through you. Perhaps it was her experience with royalty or worst case scenario, you sucked at lying.

 

“Wonderful. Please, invite the most decorated of your crew. The rest will be fed in their accommodations. Until then, I’ll have my servants show you all to your rooms.” You look over your shoulder and signal for your personal guard to ring for your servants.

 

Leia and you exchange small talk as the servants flood the room one by one. After directing them all to her and having her explain who all is staying, you excuse yourself to your chambers. In the commotion, your bodyguard doesn’t see you slip from the room, giving you some much needed alone time.

 

The rain has calmed since this morning. Instead of the heavy downpour, it now fell in a low patter. You stopped in the hall that bridged the main building to the east wing of bedrooms to stare down at the immediate town outside your castle through the window. The entirety of the hall, except the floor, was encased in glass that curved into an arch. The grey clouds above crawled across the sky as they wept. Their tears left a cool chill to the glass and if you touched it, a foggy print would be left behind to slowly dissipate. 

 

The rain accumulated into the ground and you hoped the irrigation system was back to functioning after its failure last week. If not, the whole town would flood. You see, your home planet of Cronathea was in a constant state of rain. It was an endless cycle. However, it left your planet with lush greenery, and your most coveted export, crystals. After millennia of water leaking into the caves below, the most stunning stalagmites and stalactites formed. Your planet harvested these crystals and began to sell them to the galaxy, ensuring riches for your people. The ultimate bonus was that these crystals had no use in conflict, thus your planet was left alone if a war had broken out.

 

The only time the rain stopped was during one week later in the year, and for that whole week, your kingdom knew sunshine and dryness. Naturally, your ancestors planned an entire festival for this week, and it quickly became the point of the year that everyone looks forward to. Work halts and everyone joins the fun. Young, old rich, and poor all come together to dance, sing, and drink.

 

After gazing at the scenery below, you finally make your way back to the solitude of your chambers. Only a few years ago did they belong to your parents, but after their demise and your sudden acquisition of the throne, your presence slowly took the room over. You still kept the painting of them hung in the foyer, but you needed to move on. Dwelling on the past would ensure that you wouldn’t live to the future.

 

A tall window to the left of your bed had a small alcove of which you spent many hours reading in. The books piled high by the wall, nowhere near organized and in complete disarray. You weave your way through them to take your usual spot on the cushion, pulling your knees to your chest. A small jingle of a bell sounds in the distance and before you know it, the black mass of fur was on your lap, begging to be petted.

 

“Hello, Makas, my love,” you cooed at your cat. He murped in response, shoving his head into your hand. You giggle at him as you pick up the book resting on the window sill. He curls onto your lap as you find your page marker, ready to read until dinner time.

 

**…**

 

Your guard comes to escort you to the dining room once the meal is on the verge of being done. Your legs scream at the pleasure of being stretched, having spent the last few hours with a heavy cat on them. You would have moved him, but he looked too cute to be disturbed.

 

The guests, including Leia, have already settled into their seats when you make your entrance. She is accompanied by two men and another woman, all of whom who look nervous to be here.

 

“My apologies for my late arrival, I would have been here sooner had I known,” you say warmly. Leia only nods as the other three squirm uncomfortably in their seats. You make your way to the head of the table and sit in the elegantly carved chair. 

 

You look towards at the unnamed guests, hands rested folded in your lap. “And who might all of you be?”

 

A man in what appears to be the  _ dustiest _ outfit you've ever seen chimes in first. 

 

“Poe Dameron. Best flier in the galaxy,” he spoke with a smirk and a wink.

 

He suddenly reels back as you hear the thud of a knee colliding with the wooden table. He whips his head to look at Leia, but she maintains a look of innocence. She shrugs, looking around for the mysterious stranger who would've stepped on his foot under the table. After he angrily adjusts his jacket and crosses his arms over his chest, he looks back to you. You can see the glimpse of the smile on Leia's face when he looks away and you chuckle.

 

You turn your attention to the second man, “And you?”

 

He fidgets in his seat, wringing his hands together as he seems to focus intently on saying his name. You don't blame him, it is an unusual setting, and the guards make everyone nervous.

 

“Finn- Finn- It's Finn,” he's able to choke out after a moment of hesitation. The look of relief on his face is comical yet adorable, and you can tell that you like him already.

 

“Finn, I like that, it's spunky,” you comment. He beams, his mood and confidence growing. You hope he adjusts well to your castle.

 

Lastly, you ask the girl her name. She looks to be not as nervous as Finn, but also not as cocky as Poe. She’s the perfect balance between the two.

 

She smiles at you while waving her hand, “Hello, I’m Rey.” 

 

Rey. What a beautiful and fitting name. Her radiance does seem to fill the room now that you think about it. The wisps of her hair that fell from the hold of the buns glowed softly in the light of the dining room. It was like a heavenly halo that framed the tawniness of her skin. Her smile is alluring, yet compassionate. She could speak volumes without ever moving her lips. Her eyes are molten copper, like the bands of the rings that you wear upon your fingers. It begs you to be her jewel. Two beautiful components that shatter expectations of beauty when combined together. How delicate yet intoxicating it must be, to share the same air with her. How brilliantly consuming.

 

“It suits you,” you finally speak up. After years of expertise, it’s easy for you to speak without letting your true emotions slip through. Nonetheless, you wish you could speak the truth to this beauty.

 

“This is the woman I was telling you about,” Leia says as she nods in Rey’s direction, “I believe the two of you can learn a great deal from each other.”

 

“Oh? And what exactly can we learn from each other?” You ask. You’ve never been one for drawing a conversation out, and neither has Leia. Her hesitation has your mind scrambling as to what you and Rey could have in common, what importance the two of you could contribute.

 

Leia looks to Rey and clears her throat, nodding for her to continue the topic. Rey pauses, glancing down at her silverware. She’s mulling over the right way to say what needs to be said.

 

“I know you wish to not compromise your planet’s neutrality, but I believe you have some intel that could help the Resistance, help me,” she states.

 

You visibly tense. Your hands grip each other tightly as Rey bites her lip at your uncomfortable shift in character. Please, don’t let her say it.

 

“With Kylo Ren,” she reluctantly discloses. “I am… strong with the force,” she says as if she still has to convince herself of the fact, “And I thought I could bring him back to the light, but I failed and-”

 

The deadly grip you have on the edge of the table is enough to keep her from continuing. You have to keep a cool head, if not for reputation then at least for Leia’s sake. The events at the Jedi Temple shook you both to your very cores, yet she still had hope and you had nothing. Every time you thought you had moved past it, the simplest reminder would dig up old feelings and you’d be left at square one. 

 

“I believe this situation would best be left to Luke and Han, don’t you agree?” You ask bitterly through gritted teeth. All members at the table shared awkward glances. Who would be the one to tell you?

 

“I’m afraid that neither are with us anymore,” the man called Poe says with his own grief.

 

You fall back into your chair, hands no longer gripping the table but instead pulling your hair. The detail-oriented braid was no doubt ruined, the crystals intertwined with the strands falling out and clattering to the floor. 

 

Your voice shakes, “They’re dead? And you didn’t think I should have been  _ told _ ?!” 

 

“Y/N, please, it was a stressful time for all of us,” Leia pleads.

 

You stand from your chair, the wooden legs harshly scraping against the marble floor. “I’m sorry, but I must retire now. I’ve lost my appetite.”

 

You leave without another syllable or look to your guests. They all sit in silence as you leave, not wishing to press the issue. Rey is the most upset.

 

It doesn’t take you long to reach your chambers. In your fuming state, you were practically in a near sprint to get away. Once you’ve reached the solitude of your room, you crumple against the door. You will the feeling to cry to the top of your priorities but no tears come, just the indecent gasps for air. You find yourself stumbling to the drawer of your bedside table as if you were a drunken fool. In a way, you were drunk, but not on a vivacious wine. No, you were drunk on what ifs and maybes. Drunk on what could have been.

 

You open the drawer and push steadily on the farthest point of the bottom, releasing the false panel. It clunks heavily as you pull it out and set it on your mattress. Inside, the loose papers taunt you even though they are placed facing down. They whisper to you, begging for answers, begging for confessions. You pick up the topmost piece of paper and flip it over, reading the smeared ink.

 

_ To my dearest Y/N, _

_ You are the tide which drowns me so _

_ Yet still, you are the shore that keeps me grounded _

_ It is a dream to be consumed by all that you are _

_ With you, my flaws and edges are rounded _

 

_ Glory cannot compete with you _

_ But nobility only enhances your rapport _

_ I hope to one day know all that you are _

_ And join the crowd in their loving uproar _

 

_ Ben _

 

**Author's Note:**

> A pinterest moodboard for the story: https://pin.it/dlwsib73jfmqod
> 
> A spotify playlist for the story: https://open.spotify.com/user/acedisgrace/playlist/1Vkdqznm5TNWgi1AjOqtGn?si=NfH7jqc8RWSOQmvqo2taew


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